Where have you been, Victor?

Today is Wednesday, at 3:15 pm.

I see that life is changeable.

On this same day and time last week we were together. Now I’m in my room listening to Adele and watching the raindrops fall on my window.

What have you been doing, Victor? 

How have you been? Are you taking care of yourself? 

You took that vitamin, you know you have to, it’s almost winter, and you always get a cold when you don’t take it.

I can swear I smell you here now. Would it be possible?

This morning when I got up I put the water to heat and drank that tea we always drink together.

It’s curious to realize that we have so many shared memories, now that I don’t have you here anymore I need to search my mind and comfort my present with our sweet past.

That plant you insisted on buying for me is here, it hasn’t grown much, I think it misses you too.

How can I not miss you?

The other day I went to the movies that we always went to for 5 years in a row, is it possible to forget the countless laughs in that movie theater or just erase from my mind the times you hugged me to comfort me from a silly movie that I couldn’t stop crying?

It’s not that simple, and I understand it never will be.

Mr. Genário from the bakery asked where you were and that he misses you, when he told me that, I wanted to cry right there, but I remembered that you weren’t going to be there to comfort me.

Where have you been, Victor?

Have you been using sunscreen? It’s so important, you always forget.

I took that cooking class we always wanted to take, but our schedules didn’t match. I think you would have fun, you always managed to be more relaxed than me. I miss you, with you, life was lighter.

Had I ever said this to you?

Victor, you made my life lighter!

I met other guys, of course, some even excellent and fairytale-worthy.

But I ruined everything, Victor. I always ended up comparing them to you and I was disappointed, they didn’t even come close to your feet. They were perfect, but they weren’t you.

Today the longing doesn’t hurt me, but it’s here, it’s so real…

I miss you, Victor.

Wherever you are, be well!